SEVENTH HEAVEN
Cannons Take Two of Three, Advance to CNMSBL’s Second Saturday

Newington/Manchester, CT (AP)—In ancient astronomy, before the telescope was invented, people referred to the Sun, Moon and five planets—Mercury, Venus, Mars, Jupiter and Saturn—visible with the naked eye as the Seven Heavenly Objects. Each had its own assigned layer of heaven or sky and each was considered to be one step further away from Earth and one step closer to God. It was believed by many cultures, and still is by some today, that when people died their souls floated in the sky as they visited each of the Seven Heavenly Objects on their travels to the outermost layer of heaven. When they reached that final destination, they actually met God who existed just above the last layer of heaven. On Saturday and Sunday, the Connecticut Cannons baseball team (the seventh seed in these 2008 CNMSBL Playoffs) moved closer to its final destination, a first-ever A Division title, with a pair of heavenly postseason performances. And though the near-nirvana inducing play of Saturday—3-2 and 7-5 late game come-from-behind wins against second seeded Bristol and third seeded Winsted—could not be carried over into Sunday—a 7-0 loss to top seeded Marlborough—the Cannons 2008 travels continue while the journey for five of the league’s eight teams has come to a close. Connecticut lives to play another day and that is all a team can ask for in a survive-and-advance double elimination tournament.

Opening round action at Alumni Field in Newington found the Cannons matched against long-time nemesis the Metallurgists of Bristol, a team that had amassed an unblemished 7-0 record against Connecticut in regular- and postseason play. Cannons Manager Matt Celio, brimming with confidence, was excited by the opportunity in front of his team: “[Assistant Manager Mike] Web[er] asked the time-honored tournament question ‘Why not us?’ in a press conference earlier this week and I concur unequivocally with this query. We’ve come a long way as a team and I think we have a chance to do something very special here. We can effectively take care of two birds with one stone: winning our first round game while beating Bristol for the first time in franchise history. We’ve played good baseball at times but in no way have we played our best baseball. Our ‘A Game’ awaits and that is a scary proposition for the opposition. Is there any team out there that poses a serious threat? This is one of those dare-to-be-great moments and I know we will make the most of it.” Connecticut, sporting its strongest line-up since the season’s opening Sunday, marched ageless left-hander Mike “Ponce de Cannon” Patenaude to the mound against Bristol’s lefty ace Giglielmo “Radio” Arconti and runs would prove to be at a premium as both pitchers pounded the strike zone. Lead off batter Jason “White Shoes” Maule started the playoff party in the first as he singled and used his wheels to eventually end up at third base but he was stranded as Drew McDowell, Bill Balcerzak and Tom Clark went down in order. Patenaude allowed a single to Robert “Vanilla Ice” Rapponey but followed with a double play grounder to Balcerzak at short erasing the base runner. Doug Riemer worked a 3-and-1 count before coming up with a two-out two bagger, Oliver Platt doubled him home and Vladimir “Funky Cold” Bratina added to the lead with a run-scoring single to put the Scrappers on top by a 2-0 tally. The Cannons responded immediately as Weber doubled with one down in the top of the second and after Mike “Mayor of Manville” McGann, so named because he seems to be a magnet for man-meat whenever he is out and about, grounded out to the right side moving Weber up ninety feet Celio singled over the bag at third to put Connecticut on the board, cutting Bristol’s lead in half (the fat-footed Celio pulled a hamstring as he tried to stretch the single into a double and is listed as “questionable” for the remainder of the playoffs). Patenaude served up a single in the home half of the second—the final hit he would allow—but was able to get out of the inning as the ninth and tenth batters in the extended Metallurgist line-up grounded to first and third respectively (he would face the minimum fifteen batters in the final five innings; a 1-4-3 double play erased the lone walk the fifty-two year old issued in the fourth). Arconti was more than up to the challenge, surrendering a single to McDowell with two away in the third before recording seven consecutive outs to finish the fifth frame. Before batting in the sixth, Celio channeled his inner Tommy Lasorda—his outer already looks like the Dodgers legend—and called upon the top of the order to step up against their ferrous foes. Maule and McDowell took their manager at his word, blasting back-to-back solo shots into the right and left-center stands, putting the Cannons on top with Patenaude needing to record just six outs for his team to advance. A pumped up Patenaude (7 IP, 5 H, 2 ER, 3 K, 1 BB) struck out three of the final six batters he faced tossing just eighty-seven spectacular pitches while adding another page to his already storied postseason scrapbook. “MP has won some huge games for us in eight seasons of playoff pitching performances,” marveled Celio. “But the ‘Old Man of the C’ was really dealing out there today and the defense didn’t disappoint. After the first frame he was all but untouchable. The two-seamer he added in the off-season has made him so much more effective and I’m sure Bristol barely knows what hit ‘em out there. This guy is big time.” McDowell added accolades for another teammate: “Jason is the man. To step up to the plate late in a ball game and tie things up with one swing of the stick is enormous. He’s the definition of a professional hitter. All the pressure was off and I knew I could just sit back and wait on Arconti’s change-up. Fortunately I got the pitch I was looking for and was able to put a good swing on it. I’m really proud of how this team stayed in it. We never gave up and I think that bodes well for us as the playoffs roll on.”

With the win, Connecticut packed up its equipment and headed to Manchester Community College to face the winner of the 6 @ 3 match-up between the Cubs of Eastern Connecticut and the Rifles (a 4-3 comeback victory somewhat similar to the heroics displayed by the Cannons). Connecticut once again got early production from its lead-off batter as Maule doubled and stole third easily. With the contact play on, Balcerzak hit a bouncer back to the box that was fielded and flipped home by Artie Lange to cut down the Cannons’ centerfielder and Winsted was able to escape the frame unharmed. “Rubber Man” Patenaude promised to provide as much pitching as possible as he continued to baffle batters, setting down the first five batters he faced and six of his first seven (a Dane Cooke double came with two outs in the second). Connecticut’s offense received some much-needed support from the bottom third as Chris Barsa singled with one out and Andy Borst worked a walk. Maule had an RBI single and McDowell followed with a two-run scorcher to the wall that landed him on second with another big time extra base hit. After eight consecutive scoreless innings, Howie Longhi singled after falling behind 0-and-2 and fouling off three pitches. Garrett Leifert hit a nubber toward third that Patenaude fielded and fired to first but the ball got away from Barsa and skipped dangerously down the right field fence. McDowell hustled and heaved the ball back into the infield but Longhi had scored and Leifert stood on third courtesy of the three-bag error. Al Boucino lofted a sacrifice fly to right and the three run Connecticut cushion had been quickly chopped to one. In the top of the fourth Maule walked and was driven home by Balcerzak (his first postseason RBI as a member of the Cannons) to push the Big Guns further in front but the lead would be short-lived as Patenaude (4 IP, 5 H, 5 R, 3 ER, 1 K) was touched for three runs in the home half of the inning. Billy Dee Williams led off with a double and Manager Paul “Digger” Graves reached as Balcerzak’s throw one-hopped Barsa and could not be corralled. Cooke’s single scored Williams and Graves raced to a vacated home plate as Andy Borst backed up the play at first to knot the score at four. Longhi’s fielder’s choice erased Cooke but the second baseman was able to score as the ninth batter, Leifert, doubled home the go-ahead run for a 5-4 Winsted advantage. “One hundred forty-eight pitches is a bunch and as expected Mike wasn’t as sharp as he had been earlier in the day as the pitch count mounted (forty-one of those pitches were tossed in the third and fourth frames),” Celio said in his post-game press conference. “He gave us everything he had in the tank—in fact, I’m sure he wanted to go back out there in the fifth—but with Tommy waiting in the wings we decided it was time for a change. Few teams have two top-of-the-rotation guys on their staff plus the luxury to have innings eaten up on a back-to-back basis. This is the playoffs and both of these guys put their egos aside and did what was best for the team. It’s what you expect from professionals and it’s why we have these guys locked into long-term contracts. It’s money well spent: these guys were fun to watch today.” Right-hander Clark entered in the home half of the fifth and was helped immediately by his defense as McDowell made a tumbling grab in left off the bat of William DeVanney (McDowell started the game in right but moved to the other side of the outfield when Clark went to the mound; John “Blue Fire” Mancini took over for McDowell in right). Danny DiVita reached via a base on balls but was put in the book when Williams grounded into a fielder’s choice to Leo Dionicio at second. Willimas stole second, moving into scoring position, but was caught napping as Balcerzak snuck in behind him and Clark put another of his patented pick-off throws on the money. With the Cannons once again down by a run in the top of the sixth Celio implored his first five batters to deliver in the clutch and they did just that. McDowell singled (his fourth hit of the day) and moved up ninety feet on a passed ball. With two outs, Clark doubled to deep left field to tie the game and soon thereafter scored as Dionicio doubled him home to put the Cannons back on top by a score of 6-5. “I had goose bumps all up and down my arms when [Celio] talked to the team. This was a pressure moment for us and in those situations I love to grab my bat and stroke some balls. It feels really nice.” Clark ran into some trouble in the bottom of the inning as he walked Graves and beaned Cooke. A sacrifice bunt to third moved both runners into scoring position but the defense made big play after big play to keep the Rifles at bay. Balcerzak fielded a sharply hit grounder at short and threw the pill to the plate. Though the throw was off line and a bit in front of the dish Borst was able to scoop it up and slap a tag on Williams (pinch running for Graves) whose indecision was apparent from the moment the ball left the bat. Incredibly, Dionicio was able to surprise Cooke as Clark threw another perfect pick to end the inning. Barsa led off the seventh with a triple to center and scored on a Borst sacrifice fly to push the lead back to two and Clark (3 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 2 K, 3 BB, 1 HBP), like his left-handed counterpart Patenaude, sensed victory and shut Winsted down by striking out two of the four batters he faced in the final frame (DeVanney managed a harmless two-out walk). In madness normally reserved for March, the Connecticut Cannons summarily sent the CNMSBL’s second and third seeds into the losers’ bracket, setting up a showdown with bitter rival Marlborough in Sunday’s sole match-up of undefeated teams, a pairing unexpected in every A Division town not named Newington. To be the best Connecticut would have to beat the best (the A’s finished the regular season a league-leading 13-5).

The Athletics were undoubtedly stunned to see the Cannons across the diamond on this sun-dappled Sunday morning, a team they had beaten handily during the regular season by scores of 6-3 and 12-2. After a forty-three pitch performance in Saturday afternoon’s victory, Clark called for the ball as Connecticut looked for its first ever A Division finals berth. The A’s, matched against eighth seeded Newington and fourth seeded Glastonbury on opening day play, were able to conserve staff ace Giuseppe “Celebrity” Moletti for this important contest (in contrast, the Cannons were without third and fourth pitchers Kevin Quinn and Adam Pallone both of whom were in New Jersey for Pallone’s nuptials). For the first time this postseason Maule was unable to lead off the game by getting on and Marlborough was able to breathe a collective sigh of relief once the reigning Offensive Player of the Year and Most Valuable Cannon was retired (even though McDowell singled and stole second later in the inning he was stranded by Balcerzak and Clark). The A’s struck early as first batter Buddy “Saved By the” Bell singled and Moletti was issued a free pass. After getting Mason “The Line” Dixon to pop weakly to second, Rhett Baron hit a ground ball to “Latin Lothario” Dionicio which he gloved and gunned to second but field umpire Kellen Heller missed the force out and called all runners safe (the ensuing throw to first to salvage an out bounced up the first base line and Bell was able to scamper home with the first run of the game). Clark settled down and got a pair of ground outs to Balcerzak at short limiting Marlborough to a 1-0 lead. Moletti retired eight of the next nine batters he faced (a two-out Clark double in the fourth was the lone blemish) and as his Cannons counterpart crossed the one hundred-pitch barrier on the weekend he started to show signs of being human. Bell doubled to lead off the home half of the fourth and Moletti drove him home with a base hit. A pair of seeing eye singles from Baron and Shannen “90210” Doherty loaded the bases and a Brett “Plan B” Jacobsen sacrifice fly to left pushed the Athletics advantage to three. Connecticut went quietly in the fifth but Marlborough would strike for four more runs against Clark (4.2 IP, 12 H, 7 R, 5 ER, 1 K, 4 BB, 1 HBP) in the bottom of the inning. David “The Doctor” Livingston and Loni “WKRP” Anderson, the eighth and ninth batters in the A’s order, singled to start the frame (Livingston later scored on a wild pitch) and Moletti followed with a one-out walk. Mason and Baron had back-to-back RBI singles as Marlborough’s lead swelled to six and Patenaude (1.1 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 1 K, 0 BB) replaced Clark. The left-hander allowed a sun-aided run-scoring single to Doherty but was able to wiggle out of a bases loaded jam as Livingston, batting for the second time in the inning, flew out to a diving Clark in right. Maule was hit by a pitch in the sixth while Jack Vanasse worked a walk and Barsa singled in the seventh but the Cannons were unable to push the runners across as Moletti secured the shutout with a strike out of Borst. Celio was proud of his team’s effort but was also realistic about a major missed opportunity: “We played terrific baseball for much of the weekend and we live to play another day. There’s something to be said for finishing higher in the regular season standings and the easier road that comes along with it. There are no easy games in the playoffs but there are easier match-ups. Many of the things that made us so solid on Saturday—clutch hitting regardless of the number of outs, putting the opponent’s lead-off batter in the book inning after inning and a certain swagger that allowed us to battle back from adversity—were in short supply on Sunday. Tom and Mike gave everything they had once again and I probably left TC out there one frame too long but if we don’t put any runs on the board it doesn’t really matter how many the other team scores: 1-0, 3-0, or 7-0 is all the same at the end of the day. Letting things outside our control, like a short roster, umpires and a high sky, become distractions derailed us a bit out there today. We have to expect to win despite the difficulties facing us and stay together as a team no matter what. The A’s are in an enviable position but if we play ball the way we’re capable of anything is possible. Our goals haven’t changed since April and we’ll still be playing ball on the final weekend of the season while five teams will be watching on television. We’re not settling and we’re not satisfied with third place. The title is right there for the taking and this is not a spot that will intimidate us in any way. Don’t count the Cannons out just yet.”

The seventh seeded Cannons were stalled at level three on their way to hardball heaven. They reached the Moon but the Athletics were their Apollo 13. “Newington, we have a problem.” But not one that is insurmountable. It’s been said that if you shoot for the Moon, even if you miss you’ll land among the stars and the brightest stars in the CNMSBL galaxy will be on display next weekend as the Rifles, Athletics and Cannons continue the celestial journey toward a Championship. Next up for Connecticut is a Saturday single elimination date with Winsted at Manchester Community College (despite defeating the Rifles on the opening weekend, the Cannons still come in as the lower seed and will play as the road team; with a pair of wins on Saturday Connecticut would become the home team for the final contest of the ’08 season). The winner advances to a two-game series against the Athletics that will determine the 2008 CNMSBL A Division Champion. In order to capture the crown the Connecticut will have to do the unprecedented: defeat the one seed twice, the two seed once and the three seed twice on successive weekends. Hoisting the highly-coveted hardware that is the Clinton Trophy above Connecticut’s collective heads would be nothing short of heavenly. Like Wham!, we waver on the edge of heaven…and it can’t wait. Elysium is ahead Cannon Nation. Tickets for the August 16 match-up against the Pea Shooters and all subsequent contests are sold out. Get you RED on…and there’s only one crimson ball club left!

Cannons News and Notes: The nine total team wins shattered the old mark of six set in both 2006 and 2007; McDowell’s five hits were the most on the team (Maule followed with four…Barsa, Clark and Dionicio all had multiple hits); Maule’s four hits give him twenty in thirty postseason at-bats since ’06 (.667); ten of the Cannons twenty hits in the three games went for extra bases (seven doubles, one triple, two home runs); Barsa’s lifetime batting average jumps 62 points from the regular season (.280) to the playoffs (.342); Connecticut was 17 for 53 (.293) against Bristol and Winsted but only 3 for 24 (.125) against Marlborough dropping the team batting average for the full weekend to .244 (on-base percentage dipped from .345 in the regular season to .303 with just 27 of 89 runners reaching safely); Patenaude put up impressive numbers while pitching in all three contests: 12.1 IP, 10 H, 1 BB, 0.91 WHIP, .204 BAA, 2.85 ERA; Connecticut’s team ERA fell from 4.19 in regular season play to a solid 3.50 through the first three games of the playoffs; McGann wore eye black for the first time this season in the Winsted game to combat the blazing sunlight (not only did the black burn his face but he went down three time via the backwards K); when Dionicio’s children arrived on Saturday afternoon each greeted Barsa with his or her own version of the “Bronx Cheer,” telling the first baseman, “You stink Barsa!”; “WMD”…President Bush doesn’t have to visit Iraq to find them according to Dionicio, he just needs to enjoy some Cannons Baseball…members of the Mass Destruction Mashers include the Ws (William Balcerzak and Weber), Ms (Maule and McDowell) and the D (Dionicio); Celio (fat) and Borst (funky) earned the nickname “Pineapple Express” when batting back-to-back at the bottom of the Connecticut order in game one after the Seth Rogen/James Franco vehicle that hit theaters earlier in the week; Tom Luby and Kevin McGann were seen in attendance at last weekend’s games (Luby is still under contract with the Cannons through the 2010 season…McGann has been involved in conversation with Luby’s agent about a possible return to the team in ’09); Celio, Clark, McGann and Balcerzak spent an alcohol-soaked Thursday evening out on the town after a cage session at Baseball City that provided plenty of CNN fodder: Clark/Celio defeated Balcerzak/McGann two to one in darts at The Spigot in Hartford where TC played Abba’s “Take a Chance on Me”—a Weber fave—on the jukebox (a not-so-veiled attempt to manipulate management’s rotational reasoning?)…at Plan B in West Hartford, the Cannon quartet was immediately whisked to the “best table in the house” as Balcerzak was mistaken for “The Golden Boy” Oscar de la Hoya…in what could only be described as homeroom high jinx, Clark had his chair pulled from under him by an overprotective patron (the pitcher, not wanting to hit his head, flung himself into the crowded bar area, injuring a female customer who was celebrating her birthday)…Clark became the first person in history to order the spaghetti and meatballs at the award-winning burger joint but it turned out to be an inspired choice: when his meal arrived the obviously-smitten server told the thirty-eight year old he had “beautiful balls” and even fed that ’08 Cannons batting champ his last lump (McGann, showing why he has been so successful with the ladies for the last decade, said: “Ten years ago I wouldn’t have picked up on a comment like that, but now I’m totally in tune with it.”)…“Gimme Three Steps” by Lynyrd Skynyrd was the first song to be played at both bars (Balcerzak hopes to attend the Kid Rock/Skynyrd “Rock and Rebels” concert at the New England Dodge Music Center at the end of August) fascinated by the phallic nature of the Cannons logo, provided a possible name change if the team ever decides to go a different route: the Connecticut Vaginal Butt Farts…imagine the marketing and media tie-ins!