EIGHT MEN OUT FOR KEYSTONE CANNONS
Connecticut Implodes Rather Than Explodes In Playoffs; Set Sites On ’08 Season

Newington, CT (AP)—The Keystone Cops were an insanely incompetent group of policemen who graced the silver screen between 1912 and 1917 in Mack Sennett’s slapstick series of films. The term has since come to be used to criticize any group for its mistakes, particularly if the miscues occur with a great sense of regularity and/or in an activity where excessive amounts of energy are expended, eventually for naught. Saturday’s opening round of the 2007 CNMSBL playoffs saw the Connecticut Cannons stumble and bumble their way to an early exit in the A Division’s second season at Sacco Stadium at Alumni Field in Newington. Less than a week ago, Connecticut played its best baseball of the campaign sweeping the regular season finale against the Eastern Connecticut Cubs while earning the label of championship “contender.” Today the 2007 season has come to a quick close with a faint fizzle rather than a ballyhooed bang and “pretender” seems a more apropos assessment of this season’s Cannons: foiled again, folks. Expectations were high for this team—the franchise felt from the beginning that it was time to “Kick ‘A’ and Take Names” after a successful playoff run in 2006—and despite on- and off-field upgrades including a trio of preseason signings that unquestionably made them better the bite of the injury bug, especially to the pitching staff, showed the Cannons have yet to make the leap to elite status in the league. Questions persist in most facets of the game and Connecticut must address these issues if they plan to compete for the 2008 title (and obviously they do). It has been said that August games are often won in the off-season so it’s time to get cracking, Cannon Nation, and close the gap between nearly-was and almost-ran to perennial powerhouse. If you’re not getting better then you’re getting worse and things don’t get much worse than they did on Saturday.

Game One’s match-up with the second-seeded Hartford Nationals (13-5 regular season) pitted veteran pitcher Mike Patenaude against hard-throwing Pete Erlich, the New Jersey native and late addition to the Nats rotation and playoff roster. Patenaude was staked to an early lead as Hartford’s right-hander encountered control issues from the onset (when discussing the power pitcher’s potential John Mancini postulated: “Well, so far his best pitch is a ball so it’s hard to say.”). Jason Maule led off the game with a base on balls but was erased on Steve Markie’s fielder’s choice. Leo Dionicio and Tom Luby followed with singles to load the bases and Drew McDowell worked a walk to move Markie home with the first Cannons run and the first postseason RBI of his career. However, Connecticut would fail to do further damage as Mark Lynch and Mike Calabrese were handled by Erlich and Hartford came to the plate in the home half of the first breathing a collective sigh of relief to be down just one. Spotty defense—damaging dropped balls, myriad misplays and awful overthrows—marred the first frame for the Cannons as Patenaude was dinked and dunked for three runs on two walks, three hits and three errors as the Nationals made the most of their multiple opportunities. Offensively things became even more botched and blundered in the second for the Cannons. Connecticut initially showed signs of bouncing back as Chris Barsa singled to start the frame (Calabrese entered as a pinch runner), Mike McGann fought pitches off for a free pass and Jason “Truth” Maule (as The Police sing on their Outlandos d’Amour tune: “Truth” hits everybody) stroked a sharp base hit to center. This ball was hit so hard—reaching Juan Rosado almost immediately on a single hop—that Manager Matt Celio was forced to hold Cal at third. McGann, motoring all the way, never noticed that the lead runner had halted and after a ridiculously orchestrated run-down the Cannons, rather than having a bases loaded situation with no outs, found themselves instead with two down and Maule soberly standing on second. Markie grounded out to end the inning extinguishing the proverbial fire that had sparked the Cannons’ fuse in the early going and the team was unable to recover. Patenaude (2 IP, 7 R, 4 ER, 7 H, 3 BB) surrendered four runs on a walk and four consecutive hits (a double, three singles) in the second and was removed at the end of the inning in favor of Calabrese, the shortest start of the left-hander’s seven-year Cannon career. Cal (4 IP, 0 R, 2 H, 1 K, 4 BB), pitching for the first time since his July 22 loss to John Skinner and the Glastonbury Marlins, was lights out limiting the heavy-hitting Hartford line-up to just two hits over the final five frames. Connecticut rallied for three runs in the fifth as Kevin Quinn singled, Lynch and Calabrese were issued walks and Barsa torched a two-run single as the hustling Cannons’ catcher beat out a bang-bang play at the plate. McGann worked another walk, the twelfth of his post-season career moving him into sole possession of second place on the team’s all-time list ahead of Ed Poland (11) and behind Andy Borst (14), and Maule hit a sacrifice fly to deep right field scoring Cal. Unfortunately the Cannons last two chances amounted to nothing as Erlich, despite nine walks over the first five frames, retired the sides in order over the final two innings for a 7-4 Hartford win (the Nats dropped a 5-4 thriller to the Fish in the afternoon game but both advanced to next weekend’s action with the winner facing the Cubbies for the CNMSBL crown). “We knew we were playing a solid ball club today in the Nationals,” said Celio between games. “But we’re most disappointed that we didn’t give them our best out there today. Running ourselves out of innings, miscues on plays that we make easily during the regular season while at the same time failing to get the shutdown performance we needed from MP (0-1) all contributed to a loss. We gift-wrapped this game for a good team and they’ve got the talent to exploit an advantage every time. We never gave up and guys were giving it their all but it was obvious to all observers that Hartford didn’t beat us as much as we beat ourselves. It’s going to sting a bit but we’ve got a chance to bounce back in the afternoon session by playing better baseball.”

Word arrived that the third-seeded Marlborough Athletics (11-7 regular season) would be Connecticut’s afternoon opponent and members of management were informed that the A’s would only be able to field a team of eight in this loser’s bracket battle. The Cannons, especially the pitchers, considered a forfeit but the Holy Trinity of Dionicio, Luby and Maule along with others decided to do the honorable thing by playing for the right to move forward (when Dionicio offered A’s Manager Paul Sciano the already-absent Barsa to fill out his roster Sciano jokingly jested: “We’ll take the forfeit instead.”). Game Two witnessed Calabrese’s return to the mound—easily his best pitching performances of the season as he posted a 2.00 ERA in seven strong innings of work, a dramatic drop from his 8.05 ERA during the regular season—for his fourth playoff start and third in the A Division and the Cannons offense was able to provide Cal with a one-run first-inning cushion. Maule mashed a single, stole second and moved to third on Quinn’s ground out to the right side. Dionicio hit a fly ball to left that somehow was secured by Keith Echevarria but still scored the Cannons’ speedy centerfielder for the early advantage. Calabrese was in command in the beginning, baffling Marlborough’s line-up over the first two innings and Connecticut’s batters were able to add to the lead in the third as Maule walked, stole second and scored on Quinn’s double off of the left field wall (Dionicio, lacking his usual hustle, grounded into a double play to end the inning as Quinn tried to take third on a grounder to the left side). With an automatic out built into the bottom of the order, the Athletics were aggressive at the plate in the third managing to put together a three-run two-out rally on a walk, a double, an error and two singles in what would be the final frame for a gassed Calabrese (3 IP, 3 R, 2 ER, 5 H, 1 K, 1 BB). The Cannons came back to take the lead in the top of the fourth as the ball began to fall in against an undermanned A’s outfield. Luby led off with a single (Dionicio was inserted as a pinch runner) and McDowell was able to double the “Dominican Dreamboat” home to tie the score at three. Celio followed with a fast-dropping double to left that moved “Drew Diesel” home with the go-ahead run (and Dionicio was once again put in as a pinch runner). Cal grounded to third for the first out of the inning but Dionicio moved up ninety feet on the play. Craig “Water” Perrier hit a ball sharply to Guido “Whacka” Moleti at second who instead of taking the easy out at first fired a laser to third catching Dionicio in a rundown for the second out and a stop to the scoring threat as McGann grounded to short to end things. Kevin Quinn (2 IP, 0R, 5 H, 1 BB, 1 HBP) entered with a tenuous one-run advantage but was able to battle out of jams in back-to-back innings courtesy of some tough-nosed tosses and solid defense from McGann—diving around the infield like a later day Louganis—Maule and Lynch who cut down Echevarria at the plate to maintain the one run margin. Patenaude pitched the sixth, allowing Derek Bell to cross with the tying tally as four straight runners reached on two walks and two singles following the free out yet fate once again seemed to favor the Cannons in the playoffs with the help of the ’07 recruiting class. Perrier pounded a ball down the vacated left field line and coasted into second with his first postseason knock and the start of a seventh-inning rally. Maule doubled home the fifth Connecticut run on his fifth hit of the day and Quinn provided some insurance as he singled home Maule for a two-run advantage with an automatic out built into the Marlborough line-up in the home half of the final frame. Patenaude (1.1 IP, 4 R, 4 ER, 6 H, 2 BB) allowed an infield single to the seventh batter Coleman Gary and a throwing error by Cal at short moved the runner into scoring position. Paddy Laughlin followed with an RBI single that put the tying run on the base paths for the A’s but with the ninth batter approaching the plate the Cannons invoked the automatic out rule against Garret Anderson. As was the case all day—Marlborough scored all of their runs in innings with the Anderson built-in out—Bell was able to single moving the lead runner into scoring position. Jimmy Mack muscled a Patenaude (0-2) pitch to the gap in right centerfield with both runners on the move and Marlborough miraculously staved off elimination with just eight players, snatching a game back from the jaws of defeat to take a 7-6 victory over the Cannons, advancing into the second round of postseason play on Sunday while avenging last season’s playoff loss against Connecticut. “You’ve got to hand it to [the Athletics],” stated a subdued Celio after the loss. “They did what they needed to in order to win the game. Six runs should have been enough for us but their pitchers threw well when they had to, the two outfielders made some solid if not spectacular plays and they hung in and rallied against the guy who has been the rock of our rotation this season. You just tip your cap and try to turn the team’s attention to the 2008 season. We’ll be back and better than ever next year, mark my words.”

On Saturday the Connecticut Cannons at times resembled the bumbling black-and-white Bobbies of the baseball world. Pitching pratfalls, batting blunders, running ramblings and fielding fiascos all played a part in the team’s early exit from postseason play. Still, the Cannons were competitive in both ball games and one has to wonder where Connecticut might have finished if they played their best baseball this weekend? The 2007 season has come to a crashing halt for the citizens of Cannon Nation but hope springs eternal and the sunny Sundays of 2008 are not that far away. Will management tender the needed transactions to take Connecticut to the CNMSBL A Division championship or are there enough pieces in place already to take the title? The core of Cannons Baseball remains intact and expectations will once again soar to stratospheric levels next season. The goal, as always, remains the same: bring a title to Newington. The ’08 champ will not be crowned until next August more than a year from now but the title will be won starting today. Connecticut's sites are set so be a part of it as the Cannons reload and reach new heights in the upcoming campaign. Despite the outcome it goes without saying that today, tomorrow and always CANNONS FOREVER!

Cannons News and Notes: Maule was five-for-five on the day becoming the first Cannon to bat 1.000 in the playoffs since Steve Markie in 2004…in two seasons with the Cannons the star centerfielder is a mind-boggling sixteen-for-twenty-one (.762) in postseason play; Luby’s seventy-nine at-bats, thirty-three hits, ten doubles, five homers, twenty runs and thirty-two RBI are all playoff tops on the team; Lynch, McDowell, Perrier and Quinn all saw the first playoff action of their careers…all four scored runs; Barsa, McDowell, Maule and Quinn had two RBI apiece on Saturday; Perrier’s Game Two seventh inning double was the 250th hit for the Cannons in the postseason; the Cannons hit .302 as a team in the ’07 playoffs, up from a regular season average of .274…Hartford and Marlborough hit a combined .418 (twenty-three-for-fifty-five) against Cannons’ pitching; Quinn pitched seven innings for the Cannons after his August call-up allowing just one unearned run; twelve of the sixteen players eligible to cast votes for the 2007 Cannons Awards did so before the 11:59 p.m. deadline on Friday, August 10…winners of the fourteen regular and postseason awards will be announced at Weber’s End-of Year Extravaganza and J-Ocktoberfest (scheduled for Saturday, October 6 beginning at 6:00 p.m.); Celio “shaved the Youk,” his Civil War-era beard, on Sunday; no rest for the weary: Celio, McGann and Perrier reaped rewards from a recruiting trip to Holyoke, MA, signing thirty-two year old right-hander “Nice Guy” Teddy Prajzner whom they watched countless hours of video on (a side stop was made at the world famous Mardi Gras strip club where McGann, in his Mike’s Hard Lemonade promotional giveaway cap, was called “the sexiest f***er in the place” by exotic dancer Rebecca…Celio paid for his private dance…Perrier received a lap dance from Autumn though she explained unnecessarily over chilled Jägermeister shots that this is not her Christian name); Celio, McGann and Weber will continue to rework the roster this week at Newington’s Mill Pond as they attempt to pen soon-to-be twenty-eight year old pitching prospect Matt Guida from West Hartford; women truly weaken legs: McGann spent his hour and forty minute break between games banging Fan of the Year nominee Sarah Akhtar, going hitless (though turning in some highlight-reel defense at second) before being lifted in favor of Patenaude.